Networking.

Networking. Meeting People. Making connections. Getting phone numbers and planning meetings. Parties. Networking. Golf outings and cook outs. Dinner with drinks afterwards. Business propositions. Networking. Smiles, sometimes genuine, sometimes not. Similar situation involving laughter. Networking. Hand shakes, high fives, thumbs up and fingers used for imaginary shootouts. Networking. How do you do's? What do you do? What are you going to do? What can you do for me? Networking.

I think you get the idea. I have moved to a place where I know no one and have little to no idea of how to do, what I want to do. So, I network. I have never ever networked before. I don't know what I am doing. I don't know how to meet people or make connections. I don't belong to country clubs or have passes to hot night clubs. I'll stop mentioning all the things I don't have.

I knew networking was involved. I knew networking was an involved process where the level of commitment can effect the type of result. I know networking can help me get to where I want to go.

I am a shy guy. I can be loud, zany, and quite comical but that is for show. I am a shy guy who is uncomfortable with myself much of the time. I cringe at trying to meet girls. I find it hard to make new friends. I am not your brochacho and I am not your sexual fantasy. I keep to myself much of the time. Networking is a daunting challenge for me. I am so good at being alone and doing things on my own that the greatest challenge in moving to California is not the move, or leaving my friends and family, or even finding a job but having to network.

A week ago I went to a party. It was fun. Industry people were in attendance. I knew 2 people attending and my knowledge of them was an hour spent with them previously at a cookout two weeks prior. So I was a lone wolf. I met people but didn't really get to know anyone. I left the party as I entered the party, a lone wolf. Side note - I think this "lone wolf" thing would sound cooler coming from someone else. I don't know if I made contacts but I told my story and heard others. Got some advice and shared my opinions. I was nervous but I pulled through. What happens next? I have no idea but hopefully something.

Yes I know. It's sort of big baby thing to cry about but come on, cut me some slack. It's a hard thing to do when you've never been comfortable with who you are and you need people to like you. Absurd as it may seem, this is who I am and I know who I want to be so sacrifices to my comfort level will just have to be made for the sake of my hopes, dreams and ambitions.

till next time.

Yes LA, I Am From Ohio

As if you couldn't tell from the title of this blog, I was born and raised in Ohio. I've spent 24 years of my life in Ohio. I am just over two months in on my LA adventure and I continue to meet new people; meeting people at work, bars, beaches and wherever I roam.

At times I have a very open, loud and boisterous personality. I dance, shout, sing, use big hand motions in public and in private, either to get a laugh or simply to stretch my body or my vocals. I like to think that someone or something is watching me at all times so best to put on a good show or at least put 100% effort.

Often times my friendly nature gets called into question. It was called into question in the fall of 09 when I last visited New York City and held the door open for a lady at a restaurant. She was shocked and questioned what I was doing. I told her, I was simply being polite. She was startled, I think startled, or maybe confused by my decent human fabric. I don't think she knew that sort of kindness existed. It's not like I rescued her purse from a thief or rescued her from a burnig building, I just held the door open for her.

Because of my personality and after living in LA the past two months I am hit weekly with comments like, "you aren't from here, are you?" No, I explain and tell them that I'm not from LA. I was born and raised in Ohio. Why are the big city minds questioning my behavior? I believe in acting like a gentleman. I admit that though I may waiver from this mode from time to time, the route is one I travel often. I believe in holding doors open, calling men "sir" and women "lady" or "miss." I don't do it to seem better or because I'm uptight, I simply do it out of respect. I try to walk on the street side of the sidewalk when walking with a lady as well as helping ladies out of cars when necessary. But generally I try to smile, be happy, respect people's space, say compliments when needed or truthful, do the best I can with what I've got and work within the philosophy that every day above ground is a good day.

Are people in LA jaded? I don't know. Have people in big cities lost simple notions of common courtesy? i don't know that either. I don't have an answer but maybe that is why my Midwest attitude is found as shocking or refreshing to those who reside here. Either way I'll take it as a compliment. The down turn is that I do meet the occasional person who says, "you aren't from here, are you?" I respond. I proudly declaring that I was born and raised in Ohio. With such a declaration I'll get something like, "I knew it. You can tell these things. Us Midwest folks are special people and it takes one to appreciate another."

I guess that is a compliment. I smile and politely agree. Maybe I agree because yes, we Midwest folk kick ass and we are not as superficial, arrogant or self indulgent as other people. But wait, then I think for a second and then I think a bit longer... what these people have been saying to me in our brief moment of Midwestern camaraderie is nothing but arrogant. Yes, we just had a little pow wow, a chuckle, a riff, a moment, about how you and I are so much better than everyone else because we are from the Midwest and it takes a "special" person to recognize it. Ugh. I feel so dirty. In the end is it really bad that I am proud of where I am from? I don't think so. It can be a tippy tight rope when discussing pride and arrogance but I am generally pretty humble and often down right self depreciating guy.

What's the lesson in all of this... I have no idea. I meet a lot of people from Chicago, Indiana, Ohio, Pittsburgh, Minnesota, and other places around the Midwest and there is comfort in that. Often times people leave where they are from because they cannot wait to escape. I left to pursue a dream and it's good to know that there are people who left their home to pursue that their own dream in Southern California.

till next time.